Chip, please.

I haven't talked to a parent with kids still living at home who hasn't had to deal with their kids and technology.   It's part of our modern world.  It is a huge priority of ours to limit our kids use of technology and media.  We know it's going to be part of their world and we're not expecting our kids never to be exposed to it--we just want to limit it as much as possible.

One rule in our house that is hard and fast: the kids are not allowed to play with our smartphones or our tablets. Period. It's not negotiable and not something we're changing our minds on. It's something we feel very strongly about. We're not giving them a $400 piece of electronics to break.  Our kids (now 4 & 6) are only given books to keep them entertained on road trips (including those over 6 hours).  When my 4 year old is the only kid at my Moms in Prayer meeting every week and needs to be kept quiet while we pray she has a backpack of books to read and coloring books and crayons to keep her entertained.  If we're out to dinner (a very rare occurrence) the kids know that coloring on their placemats is their only source of entertainment.  If I have to wait at a doctor's appointment with the kids the backpack of books and coloring books comes with us.  Instead of teaching them to be entertained by electronics we want them to learn how to entertain themselves and how to handle themselves in "adult" situations without being pacified by electronics.

Our kids also have never owned any sort of handheld game like a Leapfrog or DS and I can't see a time where they will.  It's just not going to happen in our house.

I could write entire blogs about  our reasoning for each of these, but I won't right now.  I just thought I would get it out on the table.   (As a side note, every family is different and I get that.  This is what we do and what we're making work for us).

That was about entertainment when we're away from the house.  What about when we're home?  How do we handle the kids' endless requests to play computer (Thanks to hand-me-downs from relatives and Savers, a local secondhand store, the kids each have their own refurbished PC's), watch TV or play Wii?  We give them poker chips.

No, we're not teaching them to play poker (though my 6 year old is quite good at "adult" Yahtzee).   We use the poker chips to regulate "screen time", teach the kids time management and curb the "Just one more show . . . " whines.

I fully admit there were times the kids were watching TV, playing computer or playing Wii that I lost track of time and realized later just how long they'd been zoned out in front of a screen.  I knew something had to be done to keep me accountable, too.  During one of our trips to Savers I saw a box of poker chips and our system got developed.

Each kid has a Ziploc bag with their name on it that I keep on top of the fridge.  Every Monday I fill each bag with 1 blue chip, 4 red chips and 4 white chips for a total of 4 hours of "screen time" over the course of 7 days.  When someone asks to watch TV, play computer or play Wii I ask them what color chip they're going to give me and I set a timer accordingly.  Our oven and microwave each have a timer so it's not unusual for both timers to be set simultaneously.  If I'm cooking dinner and need one of the kitchen timers I use my cell phone to monitor screen time.

When chips are gone for the week, they're gone.  One week both kids ran out of chips on Wednesday.  They were bummed about the lack of electronics the rest of the week (including none on the weekends), but they quickly learned that if they want to be able to watch TV on Saturday they better not waste them all on Tuesday :)

We have been doing this for several months and it has worked out very well. My son is in all day Kindergarten and my daughter is in preschool 2 mornings a week.  My daughter does not get any more chips than my son.  During the week my son was on Spring Break he didn't get any extra chips.

Chips can (and are) lost as punishment.  My son's teacher has "Clip It" system in her classroom with 7 color "levels" indicating a child's behavior. Every child starts the day on green.  There are 3 colors up (pink, blue, purple) and 3 colors down (yellow, orange, red).  If my son gets the highest level (purple) I give him an extra red chip that day.

Chips can only be "cashed in" after homework and chores are done.

Before we used this the kids would often ignore my "Turn the TV off" commands or would ask for "Just one more game" on the Wii.  Now the timer is the bad guy, not me. :)  It doesn't matter if they're in the middle of the game or in the middle of a show---if the timer goes off they know they either need to give me a chip or turn the screen off.  Immediately.

Our kids' computers are locked down so that the only websites they can go to are DisneyJunior.com and DrSuess.com.  The only games they have on their computers are Reader Rabbit educational games. 

We realize that as our kids get older it may not be as easy (or desirable) to continue our ban on the kids' use of our smartphones and tablets.  We also realize that this system may not work forever, but it works for now.

Our Global Wall . . . It is finished!!!!

In November I wrote Leaving a Legacy where I mentioned a Global Wall we were going to put together in our hallway.   I updated that post with a bad cell phone picture I took in January to show what it looked like before I bought frames and shelves this week.

I am THRILLED to report that several months after I started the project it is finally finished! YAY!   Because the hallway is very narrow it was hard to get decent pictures or lighting, but here are the results! I have removed the pictures from the frames so if you want to see our friends' smiling faces you need to come visit me and I'll show you in person :)  The unframed pictures you see are our Compassion kids :)  I couldn't find frames to fit the cards sent to us by Compassion so I just tacked them to the wall. 

Yesterday, Kristen at We are THAT Family announced My Walls Talk.   My walls don't speak in words, but they speak in memories.

 

 

 

 

To give a bit of perspective as to the height of this wall . . . I am 5'3 and I would hit the bottom of the lowest shelf with my forehead if I weren't paying attention. The ceiling height is 10'.



As I stand back and look at this it brings a smile to my face. (I'm also thankful I don't live in CA because some of these priceless pieces would be extremely vulnerable in an earthquake). Every day I get to see the faces of our friends who live overseas and I get to see souvenirs from trips we've made around the world and ones friends have brought us from their travels.   I am not very crafty, nor am I good at decorating so this is a HUGE accomplishment for me.  It is not an exaggeration to say this hallway is now my favorite part of the house :)

41 wks, 1 day and ALIVE!

My firstborn was born in the summer of 2006.  A few weeks before Christmas I woke up on a Saturday morning with an inkling, took a pregnancy test and then informed my husband we were going to be parents.

My first pregnancy was relatively uneventful and my husband and I were excited new parents.   As my due date got closer we found out my OB was scheduled to go on vacation starting when I was about 40.5 weeks.   While my OB was sure I'd have the baby before he left town my husband and I agreed that there were legitimate reasons for me to be induced, but my OB's vacation was not one of them.

I was due on a Saturday.  The Tuesday after my due date my husband and I went to the OB and my Dr. told me that since I was past my due date he wanted me to go to the hospital every 5 days, starting the next day for a non-stress test (NST) to make sure our son was healthy and thriving in my womb.  At that point I still wasn't dilated or effaced.  The Dr. considered stripping my membranes, but since I was "so closed" he said it probably wouldn't work.  My OB also wanted me to come back Thursday morning, his last day in the office before his vacation. Wednesday my husband and I went to the hospital and waited while I was monitored for an hour.  My son was doing wonderfully and I wasn't having any contractions so I went home while my husband went back to work.

Thursday morning my husband and I arrived at the OB's office for our 7:30 appt (the first one of the day).  After over an hour of waiting the receptionist informed us that he was still at the hospital attending to a birth and asked if we could come back in the afternoon.  My husband went to work for a few hours and I went home.  At 2:30  Thursday afternoon we were back in the OB's office.  I still wasn't dilated or effaced, but my OB said "If you'd been here this morning I probably would've induced you."  What I was thinking (but didn't say) was, "Um . . . we WERE here this morning.  You weren't AND I don't want to be induced just because you're going on vacation".  Instead of saying anything I just thanked God for the way it worked out since I didn't want to be induced for that reason.

Friday night I started feeling a bit uncomfortable.  I wasn't having contractions, but I knew something was going on (I was 40 weeks, 6 days. In Phoenix.  In the summer.  I was LOOKING for signs labor was imminent!).  Basically I felt like I was having menstrual cramps---the pressure was dull and constant--not sharp or coming and going so I knew they weren't contractions.

Saturday morning I told my husband, "Um . . . if you want to go in to work and get things done before you leave for the next two weeks today would be a REALLY good day to go do that."  My husband almost NEVER works Saturdays so he knew it had to be serious for me to suggest that.  When he asked "Why?" (knowing the answer) I told him, "I've been up all night feeling like I have cramps".  Due to some things going on at work that day my husband would've ended up having to go in, even if I hadn't already suggested it.  (BTW--he told me he got major bonus points at work by telling them he was working while I was in the earliest stages of labor).   Because I suspected that the show was about to go on I sat on the couch and did NOTHING that day.  I didn't want to wear myself out and be tired if I was going to be in labor, soon.

By the time my husband came home from work, at about 6, I was tired of sitting around the house all day and suggested we go out to dinner.   Before I got dressed for dinner I asked my husband to take some final "belly shots" since I knew they would probably be the last pictures of me pregnant.  Here is one of those.  Yeah, I should've kept the shirt COVERING the belly!

At 41 weeks pregnant wearing one of my husband's shirts while realizing I was in the early stages of labor.
  

As I was putting on my flip flops to go to dinner I felt my first, "Oh! So that's what a contraction feels like."  I looked at my watch and it was 7pm.  A few minutes later I was climbing into my husband's Nissan Xterra and felt another one.  I looked at my watch: 7:05.

We went to a restaurant around the corner from our house and when the hostess/server saw us she said "Hi! How are you two (glancing at my belly) oh . . . THREE of you doing tonight".  My husband told her (with a straight face) "I'm fine.  She's in pre-labor"  I don't think I've ever seen any one's eyes be that big :).    I had been consistently having contractions since the first one when I was putting on my flip flops, but hadn't said anything to my husband. I had looked at my watch when each one started and noticed that they were about 5 minutes apart.  Since my OB  told me to wait to go to the hospital until they were consistently 5 minutes apart for an hour I hadn't felt a huge sense of "this is it" urgency at that point.  Finally, at 7:30 we had our food and were eating when I told my husband, "We don't need to leave now, but after we're done eating it might be a good idea to go home and grab our bags before heading to the hospital."  My husband asked, "Why?" and I said, "Because I've been having contractions every 5 minutes for the past 30 minutes".  After we were full we asked for to-go boxes and my husband told our server (the same woman who had seated us) and told her "We're heading to the hospital now . . . "  I have never received my to-go box OR my check as fast in my life :)

We got to the hospital about 8:30 or 9pm.  It was around midnight when they finally decided to admit me and give me my epidural.  Because it was so late on a Saturday night I was assigned to the Dr. on call.  My OB had already given me the name of another Dr. who was covering for him while he was gone, but since that Dr. was off for the weekend there was a 3rd OB taking both of the other doctors' patients.  Though I was told her name I couldn't remember it.  My husband and I jokingly called her the "3rd string"

At this point the time gets a little fuzzy, but here's what I remember:

I was told to lay on my left for 30 minutes and then lay on my right for 30 minutes through out labor.  At one point, in the middle of the night, the overnight nurse had me lay on my left.  Immediately she started getting VERY busy and put an oxygen mask on my face as she started making phone calls.   Because I couldn't see the monitors I didn't know what was going on.  Though he is an engineer by trade my husband is a certified EMT and his mom and sister are both nurses so my husband is pretty well versed in medical situations.  Neither my husband or the nurse were talking to me (the nurse was busy with her phone calls, watching the monitors and putting the mask on me).  After a few minutes when it seemed a bit calmer I asked the nurse what happened and she told me my son's heart rate dropped into the 50's, but it had stabilized as long as I stayed on my right.  The oxygen mask I was wearing was to make sure my son had enough O2 while I was in labor.  During the busy few minutes my husband could see the monitors and knew what was going on, but I was blissfully ignorant.  Both he and the nurse were trying to keep me ignorant until I asked what was happening.




After the first scare

 

 

As long as I kept the oxygen mask on and stayed on my right side my son was fine.  We have pictures of the monitors showing us that his heart rate was 117 after the scare.  Through all of this the nurses were in touch with the Dr. on call.

Throughout the night I wouldn't fully dilate, despite having come in at a 3 and being 41 weeks so I was given pitocin. (At some point a Dr. was delivering next door and the night nurse asked her if she would come break my water). Even after being given the maximum dosage of pitocin I was "stuck" at a 9.5 for quite a while.  I believe it was hours.  I know the nurse was trying to get me to fully dilate, but she couldn't.  At this point the nurse told me she was off for the next few days, but she wouldn't be surprised if I was still there on Tuesday when she came back to work because I'd had a c-section.  That was NOT what I wanted.  I FINALLY dilated about the time the shift changed.

Once I met the new nurse my son's heart rate was stabilized, I was fully dilated, BUT he hadn't dropped far enough for me to be able to deliver him.   Throughout my labor my parents were with us in my room, but my mom had made it clear that she thought my husband and I should be alone (with the medical staff) as we welcomed our first child.  My dad left the room whenever the nurses came in, but my mom stayed in my room and behind the curtain to give me some privacy.  At one point the morning nurse thought maybe if I started pushing I would drop.  She had my mom and my husband help.  I could tell my mom was a bit uncomfortable, but she obeyed the nurses command to help me.  That didn't do the trick.  The nurse told me "You're probably going to have a c-section" and left the room.  I cried and silently prayed, "Lord, I don't want a c-section".  Less than 10 minutes later the nurse came in and my son had dropped.

At this point it was about 8:30 and the nurse told me, "The Dr. will be here at 9.  Don't push, even if you feel the urge".  A few minutes later I told her I needed to push and she said, "Don't".  Um . . . ok . . .  At 9 the nurse had me start to push.  My husband, the nurse and I were the only ones in the room.  I remember thinking, "Um . . . shouldn't there be a few more people in here?"  I pushed a few more times.  The nurse made a phone call and stepped outside.  This part is VERY fuzzy (after all, I'd been up for more than 24 hours already).   My husband said the nurse and Dr. were having a "discussion" on the phone.  All I know is I was told the Dr. wouldn't be there until 10 and not to push.  Um . . . Ok . . .

At 10am the Dr. came in.  Looking back I remember her having been in a few other times during the night, introducing herself and checking on me, but she didn't really play into the story until this point.   When the Dr. came several other nurses came by with her and they brought several trays of equipment with them.  It felt like the whole maternity ward had stepped into my room.  Since this was my first I didn't think too much of it.

The Dr. had me push a few times.  After a few pushes the Dr. said in a very no-nonsense manner, "Your baby is in distress.  He needs to come out NOW.  We're doing an episiotomy and using the vacuum.  He's coming out NOW".  Um . . . Ok.

I pushed a few more times while the Dr. used the vacuum to deliver my son.  My husband jokes I had "Nike" imprinted on my bottom because of how hard she was having to pull while I pushed  (as in she had her foot on my bottom. Obviously, she didn't).  I do know, from my husband's description that the ENTIRE vacuum was used.  I also know my son never dropped below a 0 station.

At 10:07 our son entered the world.  I don't know how long it was until my son took his first breath, but I know it was long enough for me to have the conscious thought, "Come on,  Baby. Breathe." before we heard a faint cry.   The cord had been wrapped around his neck 2x.  Every time I pushed his heart rate dropped and he was nearly strangled by it.  His initial APGAR was 6 and he was rushed over to the nurses who gave him oxygen.  He recovered quickly and his 5 minute APGAR was a 9.   Phew.

Honestly, as I look back I'm amazed at how well everything turned out.  I know several friends who have had emergency c-sections for "failure to progress" for less reasons than I did with my son.  a) I wouldn't dilate b) He wouldn't drop c) The cord was wrapped around his neck causing his heart rate to drop.  My husband's grandmother lost two sons in childbirth because they were strangled by their cord.  I'm very aware at how differently things could've gone for all of us that night. 

I have since met women who are labor and delivery nurses at the hospital where I delivered. Their consensus (confirmed after I had a "boring" delivery at the same hospital) was that the Dr. was prepared to do an emergency c-section in my room, without taking the time to wheel me into the ER and prep me there. Yes, it was that close.

I'm extremely thankful for the medical staff that night at the hospital who did what was necessary for my son and I PRAISE GOD for his grace and his mercy in allowing my son to be a normal, healthy 6 year old today.



 

First family picture.  Excuse Mommy and Daddy's appearance.  We'd been up all night :)





First day of Kindergarten, 2012



Compassion

My husband and I are huge fans of Compassion International.  When I met my husband I was broke.  I was working a full-time job and a part time job.   I didn't have a spare penny so I couldn't afford to sponsor my own child, though I'd long wanted to. 

At the time I met my husband he was sponsoring two kids through Compassion.   One was in her teens and one was about 7.  The teenager graduated after we got married and when she did we decided to sponsor another child in her same country and were assigned a young girl.  10 years later we still sponsor the same boy who was once 7 and who is now getting ready to graduate from the program himself!  The young girl we sponsored after my husband's first Compassion child graduated has since left the program.  Last weekend we got a letter from Compassion asking if we'd consider another girl from that country and we immediately said, "Yes!"  Our newest Compassion child is only about 2.5mo younger than our firstborn (son).

We have friends who have 5 children living in their home and have a Compassion child the same age as each of their kids.  Their kids are pen pals with the Compassion child their same age and all the kids get to "grow up" together.  My husband and I have always loved that idea so we were thrilled at God's handiwork in giving us a new child who is roughly the same age as our son.

The same night we received the information packet in the mail I started thinking, "Well . . . now we have a 6 year old like our son.  I wonder if there's anybody who needs a sponsor with the same birth date as our youngest (our daughter is 4)."  Sure enough, there was a little boy in Peru whose mom gave birth the same day I gave birth to my daughter.  My husband and I had a very brief conversation that night and decided it was worth it to us to add another family member :)

Every time I go on Compassion.com my heart breaks for the kids who still need sponsors.  Tonight I looked up the birth date of our oldest and "met" a little boy born the same day as him.  Oh, how I wish we could add him to our circle, too.  I also "met" Vishnu who is physically disabled and who, according to Compassion's website is in an area with a higher risk of exploitation or abuse.  Oh, how my heart breaks as I want to help Vishnu.   I want Vishnu, the boy who was born the same date as my son, and countless others to know Jesus.  I want them to grow up being well fed and knowing how much they are loved.  I want their physical and spiritual needs taken care of.  I want them to grow up and be healthy and be able to rise up and be who God created them to be.  I pray our Compassion kids will be God's messengers in their own countries and around the world.

Our Compassion kids are on our "sticks" we pray for each night and their pictures are on our "global wall" so that we see their faces, and remember to pray for them several times a day.

Advent Tree

At the end of November, my friend Korri posted on her blog about a tradition they were starting in their home called an Advent Tree.  I loved the idea so much that I went to Hobby Lobby and got started on making one for our home so we could do this every year.

I finally downloaded the pictures from December off of our camera so here's how this project looked at our house:



25 ornaments with names of God on them

About halfway through December

 

 

Each night we had one of the kids pick the ornament out of the storage container.  Interestingly enough, on the night of the tragedy in Newtown, CT my daughter picked "Prince of Peace".  This was my Facebook status that night,

Tonight as I hugged both my babies and we did the Advent Tree we've done every night in December where we spend time each night reading a name of God and looking up references in the Bible, the youngest of my children selected "Prince of Peace" for tonight's time of study and reflection.

Father, please be our Prince of Peace tonight and give all of Newtown, CT a peace that transcends all understanding, especially those Mommies and Daddies who would do anything to be able to tuck their precious babes in tonight, kiss them on the cheek and say "I love you" one more time . .

Many nights my 6 year old son and 4 year old daughter would get a bit squirmy during this time while I was reading and they sat with Daddy so I don't recommend it with children younger than them, but this was special time that I looked forward to each night. Because of our kids' ages we just read the verses and didn't follow it up with much discussion, unless they asked a question, but that will change as they get older. This is definitely a tradition we are going to continue for many years and I'm excited to see how God is going to use it in all of our lives as we prepare for the greatest birthday party ever each December!

Operation Newtown Fundraiser!

My friend, Korri, is the wife of a retired police officer.   After the shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary School she and her husband felt led to do something to bless the first responders of Newtown, CT and they formed Operation Newtown.  Operation Newtown wants to send a gift to every police officer and firefighter in Newtown, CT.  Korri has been in touch with the Chief of Police and has his blessing on this project.

My last post was about my Thirty-One business.   Yesterday I approached Korri about doing a fundraiser. 100% of my commission (25% of sales) made through the Operation Newtown Fundraiser!! link on my website will go to this group.  I am closing the party 1/23/12 and am making Korri the hostess so she'll receive all the hostess incentives.

Please contact me if you have any questions about the fundraiser.  You can "like" Operation Newtown on Facebook to learn more about this group and their mission.  There is also a Pay Pal link on the Facebook page where you can make a donation.

Thank you very much!!

It's What I Do . . .

About 5 years ago I received a Thirty-One Gifts catalog from my friend, Jamie.  I LOVED all of the products and remember thinking, "Wow!  This is the first home party thing I would actually want to host a party for."  Unfortuanately the catalog arrived the day we were moving. In the middle of a move, getting our old house ready for sale, a 20mo old and being about 5 months pregnant I wasn't really in a position to host anything at that point, epescially since Jamie lives about 1000mi away from me :)

A few months later Jamie sent me another catalog and I decided to help her out by e-mailing her link to pretty much everyone I knew.  I didn't realize it at the time, but I'd just hosted an "online party" for her and I'd earned several products for free and half price! Woo hoo!

Well . . about a year after I received the first catalog from Jamie I received another one and was showing my mom all the things I wanted and lamenting that I just couldn't justify that expense.  My mom pointed out that everything I wanted was in the enrollment kit and would only cost $99, plus by being a consultant I'd get a discount on future purchases.  I was IN! That was in April 2009 and I was the 12th Consultant in Arizona.

I am definitely NOT the top earner in the state and I don't even have a "downline" anymore, but I love the Thirty-One products and I LOVE showing them off to people so I'm going to take this one and only opportunity to show these products off to you!  The new Spring catalog came out yesterday and I'm drooling!  I think I want to move in to every room featured:) 

A few of the new Thirty-One products:

Easy Breezy Tote

U R U Keep-It Caddy



Fitted Skirt Purse
 

Every month there are Customer Specials and this month's features the new "Your Way" collection for home organization!

For the college sports fan in your life the Collegiate Spirit collection is a great way to show off your school pride!

Almost anything can be personalized, too!  With the Spring sports season getting under way I LOVE the Icon-It options for coaches gifts, as well as just for the proud parent in the stands!

Let me know if you have any questions about Thirty-One!  You can also place an order on my website!


***I am a Thirty-One Independent Consultant and the ideas expressed here are mine alone and are not necessarily those of the Thirty-One home office