Why I already know what my kids are getting for high school graduation!

Ok . . . my kids are only 8 & 6.  High school graduation isn't for another 10 & 12 years, BUT I already have their graduation gifts purchased! I'm not a "buy Christmas presents on December 23" person, but neither am I a "I have all my gifts purchased in January for next year." person So . . . what would prompt me to buy gifts in March, 2015 or events that won't happen until May, 2025 and May 2027????

A few days ago I was at a luncheon with Moms in Prayer leaders from all over Phoenix area.

We had several speakers who talked about the 4 steps of prayer we use in MIP: Praising God for who He is, Thanking God for what He has giving us, Confession, and Intercession.  While at Moms in Prayer we pray the Scriptures over our kids, their teachers, and their schools.

One of the speakers is now an "empty nester" whose kids aren't in school any longer, but she continues to gather with the same ladies who have been praying for their kids for 20+ years.  This sweet woman has now been "promoted" to grandma.  The woman who spoke to us moms still "in the trenches" said that 3x (one for each of her kids) she put her "regular" Bible down and picked up one for her child.  That Bible was the only Bible she used that year.  As she read through the Bible that year she marked it up with highlights and made notes in it for her child as she prayed the Scriptures for that child.  This woman did this for each of her kids and now plans to do it for each of her grandkids.

The woman said she gave each of her kids their marked up, prayed over, Bible and they now consider it one of their most prized possessions  (along with the quilt she made for each of them of their dad's old shirts, since their dad is now with Jesus).  I absolutely LOVED the idea and decided to do it for each of my kids.   Because my kids are 8 & 6 I don't think they'd truly appreciate the gift at this age, but I was thinking high school graduation would be an amazing time to present it to them!

I heard this on Friday and bought the kids each a Bible on Monday to get this project started.

For my kids I'm modifying it slightly . . . I will still use "my" Bible for things like church where my kids will see it.  I have my kids' new Bibles hidden so that they won't see them, yet.  I know my kids well enough to know that if they see me reading a new one they'll wonder why and I don't want to spill the secret, yet.

I am starting with my 8 year old's Bible since he'll graduate first! I am using a Bible in One Year reading plan on my phone to track my progress.  I am reading in his paper Bible, but am using the app to track my progress and give me a schedule.  Right now my son's Bible is tucked into my nightstand drawer while my daughter's is hidden in my closet.

As soon as I got back from the meeting on Friday I posted the idea on my Facebook page and several friends liked it, and some said they were going to start it.   After I bought the Bibles Monday I shared a picture on Facebook and Instagram of the Bibles I'd purchased.

Over the weekend a friend asked what kids of things I was writing in the Bible.  I'm basically highlighting and taking notes the way I would for myself.  I am also writing notes to my son with the prayers I am praying for him as I read.  For example, after reading Psalm 1 Psalm 1 I wrote "We pray you will not walk in step with the wicked.  We pray your delight will be in God's word.  We pray you will be like a tree planted in streams of water whose leaf does not wither."  Not every prayer will be able to be written out like that, due to space constraints, but that's an example.   As I am reading through Proverbs I am highlighting a lot since there is a lot of wisdom in there :)

I can't think of a better way to send our kids off to college than with the knowledge than seeing what Mom prayed for them as they were growing up.

P.S. If you know my kids . . . PLEASE don't mention this! It's a surprise! 

What Our "Homeschooling" Adventure Has Taught Me

First off, let me say when I'm talking about what's going on in our home this summer I'm using quotation marks around "homeschooling" because I'm fully aware that it's not the real homeschooling some of my friends do.  What's going on in our house is more pseudo-school than real homeschool.  More like after school tutoring than school :)

I started out the summer with grand plans of "homeschooling" my son for about 2 hours each day, 5 days a week.  I was figuring this would get him in a wonderful position to start his 1st grade year once school starts in August.   The first week I was really good about that.  The second week . . . I, uh, started slacking.  After about halfway through the second week our "school" time was him playing Starfall every day while his sister rested and I got a bit of a break.

We're now a month in and only have 6 full weeks until school starts (1 of which we'll be out of town) so my grand plans have now gone completely out the window.  I'm now to the point I'm just trying to make sure he didn't have a "summer slide".

In the past month I've learned (or confirmed):
**I'm not disciplined enough to be my child's teacher
**My son and I do not work well in a student/teacher relationship
**I'm lazy
**Coming up with age appropriate lesson plans is hard
**Choosing curriculum is a mind-boggling exercise
**Trying to figure out what my kids "should" know at this age is hard
**I have no clue how to do assessments and figure out if my kids are where they "should" be

I know if our family was committed to this full-time some of those things would work themselves out as I did further research and educated myself, but the truth is every time I've tried to think that way and look into standards and assessments I pretty much have a nervous breakdown.

I went into this summer with unrealistic expectations of our "homeschooling" time each day being a wonderful one-on-one time with my son.  Instead it's become a very stressful thing that makes me thankful for teaching professionals :) Because I won't want to "ruin" my son's summer with a screaming stressed out Mommy we're doing much less "school" than I'd anticipated and I'm fully ok with that.

I'm also left with even more respect for my friends who have determined that homeschooling is the right fit for their family and who are in the trenches as both parent and teacher to their child.

Now, excuse me while I figure out what to do with the curriculum I bought when I got ahead of myself several months ago . . .

Honest Feelings

I admit many of the things I'm going to post here aren't "right", but they're how I'm feeling.

My 4yo was diagnosed with astigmatism this week and we're currently waiting on her first pair of glasses to arrive.   I'm the only one on either side of our families that has decent vision (I wear glasses for night driving, but that's about it) so we knew it was a matter of time until our kids wore glasses, but we weren't expecting it this young (we were thinking around 9-13ish) and we weren't expecting astigmatism since it's not real common in our families.

**Learning that she's probably never truly seen clearly saddens me.

**I'm thankful she will be able to wear glasses to see clearly.

**I'm excited for her reaction when she gets her glasses and sees clearly for the first time.

**Finding out she's probably never seen clearly makes me wonder if I should've caught it sooner.

**I'm a little sad that her precious face is going to be behind glasses, until she is ready to wear contacts (we assume she'll want to eventually).

**She's already told me she's sad she's going to be the only kid in her class who wears glasses.

**I'm scared about her "fitting in".

**I have friends with daughters who started wearing glasses in preschool and I know the mean things that have been said to them.  I'm borrowing trouble by worrying about my girl having to hear the same things.

**I'm worried about quality of life with being as active as she wants (running around and worrying about her glasses falling off).

In the grand scheme of things I know this is MINOR.  I also am thankful that this is her only vision issue.  Except for the astigmatism her eyesight is fine right now (she is equally nearsighted and farsighted) so once that's corrected she'll be fine.

Here's how we found out that she needs glasses at 4:

A few months ago my son was studying the 5 senses in Kindergarten.  One day he brought home an eye chart his teacher had printed out.  My son wanted us to hang it up at home and do it.  To him it was a game so I measured 20 feet down the hallway and he showed us "how well he can see". Because my daughter didn't want to be left out she tried it.  We noticed she was struggling with some of the bottom lines.  I called the optometrist office where my husband and I go (and where our son went when he was 5) and asked if they'd see her.  I was told that for kids her age they recommend a pediatric optometrist and gave me a number.   I never got around to scheduling anything for her (Mommy fail).   Last month she hurt her eye, causing it to be red and watering constantly.   I called the optometrist that the rest of the family sees and said, "I know she's younger than you usually see, but can you get her in?".  I got a same day appointment and they did a quick assessment of her vision to get a baseline.  I noticed she was struggling around the 20/40 part of the chart, but seemed to be doing pretty well around 20/60.  Red flag, but I was (hoping) it was just because of the injury.   A few days later we went for a follow up and I noticed she was struggling in the exact same spot.  I asked the optometrist, "When do I bring her in for her first exam?" and was told any time.  I scheduled the appointment and we went Monday where we got the diagnosis.

The interesting thing is she's already reading and hasn't had any trouble at preschool with reading or writing so we really hadn't had cause to be concerned.   My husband and I were talking last night and we'd both separately remembered during the day yesterday that she used to stand close to the TV and we'd shoo her away telling her to back up.  Now we're wondering if she was doing it to see better . . .

Since she's younger than we were told to do the kids' first exam (just before starting school) I'm thankful for catching it as early as we did, but I'm also a bit sad that she's having to deal with this already (and knowing she most likely was born with this eye shape and has never seen correctly) makes me a bit sad.

Finding glasses small enough for her face (41mm) was extremely challenging, but we finally found ONE pair yesterday so we ordered them  (At previous places we could only find 43mm, which were too big.  The optometrist special ordered 42mms for her to try on because they didn't have any in stock).  My daughter was sad that all the "pretty" ones were too big for her, but I told her "You're going to wear glasses for a long time [rest of her life] so when you get bigger you'll have lots of choices and can get pretty ones".

My husband had LASIK at some point before we met (we've been together 10 years) and my sister recently had it.  After doing some research we found out she could possibly be a candidate when she gets older, if she chooses to do it so my husband and I found that encouraging (Besides, who knows what kind of technology will be available to her when she's an adult!).

All in all I know there are a million and one things to be thankful for and not upset about, but I've still struggled with feelings of sadness for her over the past few days.  Today I'm finding myself counting down the days until she gets them because I want her to be able to see everything without anything being "fuzzy".

Yesterday my daughter and I scrolled through Little Four Eyes as pictures of other kids her age (and younger) rocking their glasses :)

I'm Homeschooling!? Say . . .WHAT!?

No, we haven't changed our mind about public school, but I am currently venturing into the world of homeschooling our son while he is on summer break.  Come August he will be enrolled in 1st grade at the same neighborhood school where he attended Kindergarten.

I have long been of the belief that in order for a child to get the most out of their education Mom & Dad need to be involved. Part of that involvement, in my opinion, is by enriching at home.  After meeting with our son's Kindergarten teacher several times this year she has helped us to see areas where he is excelling and needs to be challenged beyond what I had expected to do with him at home

As a result of the conversations with his teacher, I'm "homeschooling" him this summer.  My son is like me and he loves to learn and do workbooks.  The balance we'll need to find this summer is between doing his enrichment stuff to keep him academically engaged, while still giving him a chance to have fun and have a summer break.  Right now I'm planning on doing less than an hour of school a day.

I'm trying to cover every subject this summer so he's ready to hit the ground running in August.   My son LOVES math and is very strong in it, so the math work we're doing is under the direction of his Kindergarten teacher. Since math is his favorite/strongest subject we're going to be doing math almost every day since the crazy kid thinks that's fun.  (He OBVIOUSLY didn't get that from me!) When his teacher explained to us how strong he is in math, she suggested I work with him at home.  I told her we had work books and she said, "No--he needs curriculum".  Um . . . ok.  I guess we're doing curriculum.   In addition to the resources that have been recommended to me by my friends who homeschool full-time I have taken suggestions from his Kindergarten teacher and have borrowed resources from her.  Because I was in my son's Kindergarten class about 2-3 (sometimes 4) times a month I know what type of work he is used to doing and what the 1st grade teachers at his school will be expecting he knows.

Through doing a Swagbucks search for other ideas this morning I found Peace, Love and First Grade which may become my new favorite website for finding ideas for my soon to be first grader!  One thing I printed today from there will be his writing assignment tomorrow.

Two days in this is what our "school day" has looked like.

Day 1: 6 pages of Math-U-See worksheets, 10 minutes of reading to me, 10 minutes of me reading to him
Day 2: Math-U-See Beta video, 30 minutes of writing practice

I am NOT good at math and joke he's going to eclipse my math abilities by 4th grade, but fortunately the Math-U-See videos do the teaching and I just guide him through them.  (Since he's working on adding and subtracting 3 digit numbers as well as multiplication of single digit numbers he hasn't passed me, yet.  PHEW!!)  We'll do some science experiements, too, but those intimidate me at least as much as math (if not more since I don't have the teacher on the video to guide me).

Part of why I don't think homeschooling will work for us is I know I'm not disciplined enough (or patient enough) to be my kids' only teacher, but I am enjoying this one on one time with my son while his sister has rest time in her room every day.

It's Over!

I'm not sure who has been counting down the days until summer vacation more--my son or me.   I'm thinking it was probably me because I'm READY to have my Buddy Boy home for the next few months.  I'm not going to lie--the events in CT in December really messed with my mind and it was hard to drop my son off at school every day.

We're still committed to sending him (and eventually our daughter) to public school, but I missed having him around during the day this year.  Even saying that sounds odd to me because I thought for sure I'd be the mom crying tears of joy on the first day of school thankful to have time to myself for the first time in 6 years.  (Our 4 year old went to preschool 2 mornings a week this year, which meant I had 7 hours a week where I could shower, go to the bathroom and go to Costco by myself for the first time since August, 2006).  It turns out I really enjoy my son (when he's not melting down!) and I like having him with me. 

My husband gives me a week before I'm ready to send him back to school :)

I was warned that, as much as it seems time has flown in the past 6 years, once the kids start school it will REALLY fly.  I believe that because I can't believe my son is now done with Kindergarten and on his way to 1st grade!

I was also not prepared for how much my son would physically change in the months between his first day of Kindergarten and his last.

 

 

First Day of Kindergarten
August, 2012

 

 

Last Day of Kindergarten
May, 2012

A few things stand out to me in this picture:
1) He has definitely aged since August
2) Look at where his head is in relation to the doorknob (the main reason I take "milestone" pictures at the front door is to measure them in relation to the fixtures)
3) Look at those "puppy dog" feet!!


As of the first day of school he hadn't lost any teeth, but he now has his bottom two "adult teeth" growing in.

I was handling today pretty well and then, after school, I saw a friend and said "Last day of Kindergarten" as I started saying it my eyes welled up and I was having trouble talking.  I truly can't believe his first year of school is over and that there are only 12 more years until he's walking across a stage in a cap and gown receiving his high school diploma.

If anybody finds life's "pause" button could you please send it to me because I could REALLY use it!!!

41 wks, 1 day and ALIVE!

My firstborn was born in the summer of 2006.  A few weeks before Christmas I woke up on a Saturday morning with an inkling, took a pregnancy test and then informed my husband we were going to be parents.

My first pregnancy was relatively uneventful and my husband and I were excited new parents.   As my due date got closer we found out my OB was scheduled to go on vacation starting when I was about 40.5 weeks.   While my OB was sure I'd have the baby before he left town my husband and I agreed that there were legitimate reasons for me to be induced, but my OB's vacation was not one of them.

I was due on a Saturday.  The Tuesday after my due date my husband and I went to the OB and my Dr. told me that since I was past my due date he wanted me to go to the hospital every 5 days, starting the next day for a non-stress test (NST) to make sure our son was healthy and thriving in my womb.  At that point I still wasn't dilated or effaced.  The Dr. considered stripping my membranes, but since I was "so closed" he said it probably wouldn't work.  My OB also wanted me to come back Thursday morning, his last day in the office before his vacation. Wednesday my husband and I went to the hospital and waited while I was monitored for an hour.  My son was doing wonderfully and I wasn't having any contractions so I went home while my husband went back to work.

Thursday morning my husband and I arrived at the OB's office for our 7:30 appt (the first one of the day).  After over an hour of waiting the receptionist informed us that he was still at the hospital attending to a birth and asked if we could come back in the afternoon.  My husband went to work for a few hours and I went home.  At 2:30  Thursday afternoon we were back in the OB's office.  I still wasn't dilated or effaced, but my OB said "If you'd been here this morning I probably would've induced you."  What I was thinking (but didn't say) was, "Um . . . we WERE here this morning.  You weren't AND I don't want to be induced just because you're going on vacation".  Instead of saying anything I just thanked God for the way it worked out since I didn't want to be induced for that reason.

Friday night I started feeling a bit uncomfortable.  I wasn't having contractions, but I knew something was going on (I was 40 weeks, 6 days. In Phoenix.  In the summer.  I was LOOKING for signs labor was imminent!).  Basically I felt like I was having menstrual cramps---the pressure was dull and constant--not sharp or coming and going so I knew they weren't contractions.

Saturday morning I told my husband, "Um . . . if you want to go in to work and get things done before you leave for the next two weeks today would be a REALLY good day to go do that."  My husband almost NEVER works Saturdays so he knew it had to be serious for me to suggest that.  When he asked "Why?" (knowing the answer) I told him, "I've been up all night feeling like I have cramps".  Due to some things going on at work that day my husband would've ended up having to go in, even if I hadn't already suggested it.  (BTW--he told me he got major bonus points at work by telling them he was working while I was in the earliest stages of labor).   Because I suspected that the show was about to go on I sat on the couch and did NOTHING that day.  I didn't want to wear myself out and be tired if I was going to be in labor, soon.

By the time my husband came home from work, at about 6, I was tired of sitting around the house all day and suggested we go out to dinner.   Before I got dressed for dinner I asked my husband to take some final "belly shots" since I knew they would probably be the last pictures of me pregnant.  Here is one of those.  Yeah, I should've kept the shirt COVERING the belly!

At 41 weeks pregnant wearing one of my husband's shirts while realizing I was in the early stages of labor.
  

As I was putting on my flip flops to go to dinner I felt my first, "Oh! So that's what a contraction feels like."  I looked at my watch and it was 7pm.  A few minutes later I was climbing into my husband's Nissan Xterra and felt another one.  I looked at my watch: 7:05.

We went to a restaurant around the corner from our house and when the hostess/server saw us she said "Hi! How are you two (glancing at my belly) oh . . . THREE of you doing tonight".  My husband told her (with a straight face) "I'm fine.  She's in pre-labor"  I don't think I've ever seen any one's eyes be that big :).    I had been consistently having contractions since the first one when I was putting on my flip flops, but hadn't said anything to my husband. I had looked at my watch when each one started and noticed that they were about 5 minutes apart.  Since my OB  told me to wait to go to the hospital until they were consistently 5 minutes apart for an hour I hadn't felt a huge sense of "this is it" urgency at that point.  Finally, at 7:30 we had our food and were eating when I told my husband, "We don't need to leave now, but after we're done eating it might be a good idea to go home and grab our bags before heading to the hospital."  My husband asked, "Why?" and I said, "Because I've been having contractions every 5 minutes for the past 30 minutes".  After we were full we asked for to-go boxes and my husband told our server (the same woman who had seated us) and told her "We're heading to the hospital now . . . "  I have never received my to-go box OR my check as fast in my life :)

We got to the hospital about 8:30 or 9pm.  It was around midnight when they finally decided to admit me and give me my epidural.  Because it was so late on a Saturday night I was assigned to the Dr. on call.  My OB had already given me the name of another Dr. who was covering for him while he was gone, but since that Dr. was off for the weekend there was a 3rd OB taking both of the other doctors' patients.  Though I was told her name I couldn't remember it.  My husband and I jokingly called her the "3rd string"

At this point the time gets a little fuzzy, but here's what I remember:

I was told to lay on my left for 30 minutes and then lay on my right for 30 minutes through out labor.  At one point, in the middle of the night, the overnight nurse had me lay on my left.  Immediately she started getting VERY busy and put an oxygen mask on my face as she started making phone calls.   Because I couldn't see the monitors I didn't know what was going on.  Though he is an engineer by trade my husband is a certified EMT and his mom and sister are both nurses so my husband is pretty well versed in medical situations.  Neither my husband or the nurse were talking to me (the nurse was busy with her phone calls, watching the monitors and putting the mask on me).  After a few minutes when it seemed a bit calmer I asked the nurse what happened and she told me my son's heart rate dropped into the 50's, but it had stabilized as long as I stayed on my right.  The oxygen mask I was wearing was to make sure my son had enough O2 while I was in labor.  During the busy few minutes my husband could see the monitors and knew what was going on, but I was blissfully ignorant.  Both he and the nurse were trying to keep me ignorant until I asked what was happening.




After the first scare

 

 

As long as I kept the oxygen mask on and stayed on my right side my son was fine.  We have pictures of the monitors showing us that his heart rate was 117 after the scare.  Through all of this the nurses were in touch with the Dr. on call.

Throughout the night I wouldn't fully dilate, despite having come in at a 3 and being 41 weeks so I was given pitocin. (At some point a Dr. was delivering next door and the night nurse asked her if she would come break my water). Even after being given the maximum dosage of pitocin I was "stuck" at a 9.5 for quite a while.  I believe it was hours.  I know the nurse was trying to get me to fully dilate, but she couldn't.  At this point the nurse told me she was off for the next few days, but she wouldn't be surprised if I was still there on Tuesday when she came back to work because I'd had a c-section.  That was NOT what I wanted.  I FINALLY dilated about the time the shift changed.

Once I met the new nurse my son's heart rate was stabilized, I was fully dilated, BUT he hadn't dropped far enough for me to be able to deliver him.   Throughout my labor my parents were with us in my room, but my mom had made it clear that she thought my husband and I should be alone (with the medical staff) as we welcomed our first child.  My dad left the room whenever the nurses came in, but my mom stayed in my room and behind the curtain to give me some privacy.  At one point the morning nurse thought maybe if I started pushing I would drop.  She had my mom and my husband help.  I could tell my mom was a bit uncomfortable, but she obeyed the nurses command to help me.  That didn't do the trick.  The nurse told me "You're probably going to have a c-section" and left the room.  I cried and silently prayed, "Lord, I don't want a c-section".  Less than 10 minutes later the nurse came in and my son had dropped.

At this point it was about 8:30 and the nurse told me, "The Dr. will be here at 9.  Don't push, even if you feel the urge".  A few minutes later I told her I needed to push and she said, "Don't".  Um . . . ok . . .  At 9 the nurse had me start to push.  My husband, the nurse and I were the only ones in the room.  I remember thinking, "Um . . . shouldn't there be a few more people in here?"  I pushed a few more times.  The nurse made a phone call and stepped outside.  This part is VERY fuzzy (after all, I'd been up for more than 24 hours already).   My husband said the nurse and Dr. were having a "discussion" on the phone.  All I know is I was told the Dr. wouldn't be there until 10 and not to push.  Um . . . Ok . . .

At 10am the Dr. came in.  Looking back I remember her having been in a few other times during the night, introducing herself and checking on me, but she didn't really play into the story until this point.   When the Dr. came several other nurses came by with her and they brought several trays of equipment with them.  It felt like the whole maternity ward had stepped into my room.  Since this was my first I didn't think too much of it.

The Dr. had me push a few times.  After a few pushes the Dr. said in a very no-nonsense manner, "Your baby is in distress.  He needs to come out NOW.  We're doing an episiotomy and using the vacuum.  He's coming out NOW".  Um . . . Ok.

I pushed a few more times while the Dr. used the vacuum to deliver my son.  My husband jokes I had "Nike" imprinted on my bottom because of how hard she was having to pull while I pushed  (as in she had her foot on my bottom. Obviously, she didn't).  I do know, from my husband's description that the ENTIRE vacuum was used.  I also know my son never dropped below a 0 station.

At 10:07 our son entered the world.  I don't know how long it was until my son took his first breath, but I know it was long enough for me to have the conscious thought, "Come on,  Baby. Breathe." before we heard a faint cry.   The cord had been wrapped around his neck 2x.  Every time I pushed his heart rate dropped and he was nearly strangled by it.  His initial APGAR was 6 and he was rushed over to the nurses who gave him oxygen.  He recovered quickly and his 5 minute APGAR was a 9.   Phew.

Honestly, as I look back I'm amazed at how well everything turned out.  I know several friends who have had emergency c-sections for "failure to progress" for less reasons than I did with my son.  a) I wouldn't dilate b) He wouldn't drop c) The cord was wrapped around his neck causing his heart rate to drop.  My husband's grandmother lost two sons in childbirth because they were strangled by their cord.  I'm very aware at how differently things could've gone for all of us that night. 

I have since met women who are labor and delivery nurses at the hospital where I delivered. Their consensus (confirmed after I had a "boring" delivery at the same hospital) was that the Dr. was prepared to do an emergency c-section in my room, without taking the time to wheel me into the ER and prep me there. Yes, it was that close.

I'm extremely thankful for the medical staff that night at the hospital who did what was necessary for my son and I PRAISE GOD for his grace and his mercy in allowing my son to be a normal, healthy 6 year old today.



 

First family picture.  Excuse Mommy and Daddy's appearance.  We'd been up all night :)





First day of Kindergarten, 2012



Advent Tree

At the end of November, my friend Korri posted on her blog about a tradition they were starting in their home called an Advent Tree.  I loved the idea so much that I went to Hobby Lobby and got started on making one for our home so we could do this every year.

I finally downloaded the pictures from December off of our camera so here's how this project looked at our house:



25 ornaments with names of God on them

About halfway through December

 

 

Each night we had one of the kids pick the ornament out of the storage container.  Interestingly enough, on the night of the tragedy in Newtown, CT my daughter picked "Prince of Peace".  This was my Facebook status that night,

Tonight as I hugged both my babies and we did the Advent Tree we've done every night in December where we spend time each night reading a name of God and looking up references in the Bible, the youngest of my children selected "Prince of Peace" for tonight's time of study and reflection.

Father, please be our Prince of Peace tonight and give all of Newtown, CT a peace that transcends all understanding, especially those Mommies and Daddies who would do anything to be able to tuck their precious babes in tonight, kiss them on the cheek and say "I love you" one more time . .

Many nights my 6 year old son and 4 year old daughter would get a bit squirmy during this time while I was reading and they sat with Daddy so I don't recommend it with children younger than them, but this was special time that I looked forward to each night. Because of our kids' ages we just read the verses and didn't follow it up with much discussion, unless they asked a question, but that will change as they get older. This is definitely a tradition we are going to continue for many years and I'm excited to see how God is going to use it in all of our lives as we prepare for the greatest birthday party ever each December!

In the beginning . . .

Writing the story of the ornaments my husband bought after our second date and knowing this was the time of year our story began has made me a bit sentimental (especially since I'm very aware that this week marks 10 years together and I think it's a milestone worth noting).

Here is the first picture taken of us (on our second date), at his company Christmas party:

December, 2002

The most recent picture I have of us was taken by Over the Moon Photography last year during our family pictures.


October, 2011

Ornament a year . . .

My husband and I had our first date on December 8, 2002 meaning, as of Saturday, we'll have been together for 10 years! Yay us! :)

Because I was working full time as a flight attendant and part-time at a Christian bookstore when we met we didn't have a lot of time to spend together in the beginning, especially since the holidays are a notoriously busy time in the airline industry and he'd already made travel plans for the last 2 weeks of December.

The first thing my husband invited me to was his company Christmas party, which was supposed to be our first date.  Because there were about 10 days between the time he invited me to the party and the day it was scheduled, we ended up going out to dinner once in between.   With our conflicting schedules around Christmas and New Year's Eve we had known that after the weekend of his work party we wouldn't see each other until after the 1st of the year.

After one of our first two dates we were in my apartment and I was showing him the ornaments I had for my first ever tree (This was the first time I'd ever lived alone, without roommates).  All of the ornaments on my tree were ones given to me by relatives when I was a kid or by friends when I was in high school and college and I told him the story of each one.

Because he knew he would be gone for a scheduled visit to his parents' house for Christmas and then a previously scheduled New Year's Eve party at his best friend's house out of town my (now) husband left my Christmas gift with the mutual friend who had introduced us.

After only two dates this was the first ever gift my husband bought me:

After we became engaged in September, 2003 he showed me this ornament he bought at the same time he bought the first one

Needless to say a tradition was born pretty quickly :)
 
Interestingly enough, just a few days after I had set up our tree in 2005 we found out we were expecting our oldest so we have an ornament to mark that occasion, too.  When I went to Target to buy a confirmatory pregnancy test I also picked up an ornament that was a gift box that opened.  I put a note inside with the date and saying we got our present early that year in finding out we're going to become parents.  I also bought a gender neutral stocking ornament that day.   I will take pictures of those and add them to this post later.

Every year I buy an ornament that represents my husband and I and one for each of the kids.  Starting at about age 2 I let the kids pick their own out.  Some of their choices have surprised me, but I love hearing their reasons why.  I stick a note in the ornament box saying who picked out the ornament and why so I'll always remember.

My favorite part of decorating the tree each December is pulling out the ornaments and taking a trip down memory lane.   Here are a few of my favorites:



After my husband were pronounced "husband and wife" at our wedding we left the church for our reception to Smashmouth's rendition of I'm a Believer from the movie Shrek.

This was my husband's boutonnier from our wedding inside a plastic ornament ball I'd bought at Michael's

Why Santa Doesn't Live Here

2 years ago I wrote an entry I titled Santa Doesn't Live Here.  As I was re-reading it today I realized I didn't answer the "Why?" question we get so often.

Before I explain I want to add this disclaimer . . . Every family has to make their own decisions on things like this.  This is how/why our family does Christmas and I'm not trying to get into a "Mommy War" if your family does something different because I don't think it's a "right/wrong" issue.

First and foremost we don't do Santa because we don't want to lie to our kids and, in our minds, it's lying.  We feel hypocritical punishing our kids for lying and teaching them lying is wrong when we're doing it ourselves.  I know others tell us it's "Just a game", but to us it's still lying

Secondly, because we don't make a big deal of the commercial/material side of Christmas it doesn't really fit into our philosophy to be buying our kids two sets of presents: one from Santa and one from Mom and Dad.   We're on a pretty tight budget and our kids generally don't have much under the tree so I want all the credit ;) 

Also, this way I don't have to worry about older cousins, siblings or friends from school "ruining" it for my kids since I vividly remember discussions on the playground about, "My sister said there is no Santa".  As the oldest sibling and cousin I remember my mom pulling me aside when I was about 4th grade and saying, "You know there's no Santa, right?"  I told her I learned it at school already and she said, "Ok, just don't tell your sister or cousins".

When I was in college, and a new Christian, a friend was saying his family didn't do Santa when he was growing up because his parents didn't want the kids to make the correlation that if Mom and Dad were lying about Santa they must be lying about Jesus, too.   His point made sense in the fact that there is more "evidence" (to a kid) for Santa.  Santa is at the mall, Santa is on wrapping paper, NORAD tracks Santa on Christmas Eve, seemingly everyone believes in Santa, there are presents under the tree from Santa, etc.   On the other hand, not everyone believes in Jesus, you can't see Him, you only hear about Him at church, He's not mentioned on the news, etc.

(Ironically the same friend is now a dad and he and his wife have decided Santa does live at their house)

This point was driven home to me about a year ago when I saw this meme making it's way around the internet:
 

Our faith is extremely important to us and, as I've written before, we're (attempting) to leave a legacy of faith for our kids.  365 days a year Jesus comes up in natural conversation around our home and our faith is something we try to live by example.  We don't want to confuse our kids by throwing fictional characters they do see with a God who is unseen but VERY real.

How will be be celebrating without the man in red?

We will go to a Christmas Eve service at church (probably on the 22nd or 23rd to leave space on the 24th for others), but we go to church every week so this will be just another week of church for our kids.  On Christmas Eve we'll sing Happy Birthday to Jesus and blow out candles on a cake we've made for Him (but we get to eat it since He's in heaven).  Christmas morning we'll wake up and go into the living room in our pj's.  Before we do anything else we'll have a small Bible study where my husband will read Luke, chapter 2 to us and we'll discuss Jesus' birth with the kids and explain we give presents on Christmas as a symbol of the gifts Jesus received from the Magi, as well as the ultimate gift God gave us in His Son.

This year we'll be adding a new nightly tradition inspired by my friend, Korri.   This morning I bought a 4.5ft Christmas tree we'll be using specifically as an Advent tree.  I spent the afternoon labeling the ornaments and I can't wait until we start having this devotional time with our kids every evening, discussing the names of God as we prepare to celebrate the greatest gift the Earth has ever known!  (I may blog again about the tree after we get going and after I take a few pictures)

We've got a few other tricks up our sleeve, too, but this is just a glimpse of why and how we celebrate Christmas without Santa. 

If Santa is part of your Christmas tradition I'm not judging you in the least and you can just thank me for being one less person at the mall in line with her kids to get their picture taken with a bearded fat man :)

Leaving a Legacy

"These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." Deuteronomy 6:6,7

 

Last weekend we attended the memorial service of an amazing woman who left a tremendous legacy of faith for her kids, grandkids and great grandkids.  We all leave a legacy to our kids and my husband and I want to leave a legacy of faith, compassion and prayer for our kids.

Here are a few ways we're trying to live out this teaching in our family and leave a lasting legacy for our family while talking about the things of God throughout our day:

 

 

We have a cup that sits on our kitchen table that contains craft sticks.  Each craft stick has the name of friends who live overseas, our kids' teachers, the preschool director at church or our pastor. Currently there are 11 sticks. Eventually we're going to start adding other friends and family members who need prayer.  Each night before dinner one of the kids gets to "pick a stick" and we take turns praying for that person or family.  We have been doing this for about 2 months and it's worked out very well.  The kids love picking the stick so much that it's become a reward for winning the nightly manners game we learned from a friend.   This has been a wonderful time of hearing our kids hearts as we lift up others in prayer.

We have this large map hanging in our hallway.  This hallway is the gateway to our bedrooms and our office/guest room so we all pass it multiple times per day.  This is phase one of what will be our "global wall".   Right now I'm working on getting shelves to display items we've been given, or personally collected, from around the world. We also want to have pictures of the friends who we pray for surrounding it.  Our kids are simultaneously learning about where friends live and world geography.  (The first several weeks we had this map the kids would find a flag in the pictures surrounding the map and would ask me where that country is).



Our daughter's Bible is being held together by duct tape from it's nightly use

Like most parents we read our kids bedtime stories as part of our night time routine.   From the time our kids started getting a bedtime story it has always been from their Beginner's Bible.  We usually read 3 of these stories a night before prayer.  Our son turned 6 in August and has graduated to his "Big Boy Bible", though we keep his Beginner's Bible handy as a reference tool since he is so familiar with those stories (and has several of them memorized verbatim).  After Bible time is prayer time. 

Each child gets one on-one-time for Bible and prayer. When our oldest was 2 and our youngest was infant it made the most sense for my husband to tuck in our son while I nursed our daughter and rocked her to sleep.   4 years later my husband still does the bedtime routine with our oldest  most nights while I do it with our youngest, though we occasionally switch it up.

We by no means have everything figured out, but these are just some of the ways we're trying to talk with our kids about the things of God on a daily basis.


4/1/13 Update: We now have 17 sticks including our Compassion kids, members of the military and ministries we support.   The wall is almost complete and I couldn't be more excited!  There is still some work to be done: I still need to get shelves to display our items that can't be hung on the wall and I still have 2 more pictures to frame.  In addition to our friends who live overseas we also have pictures on the wall of our Compassion kids.

Here is a really bad cell phone picture of the global wall as it looked in January, before I had any of the pictures framed.  The hallway is very narrow so I couldn't get the entire thing in one shot.  The blank space above the wall will be for the shelves.



 

 

4/4/13 Update: The Global Wall project is now done and I couldn't be happier with the results!

Why We Chose Public School

This may the most controversial post I write and I don't really intend it to be because I know that there is no "one size fits all" answer for every kid and every family. Among my friends I know families who have made every school choice available: homeschool, private school, neighborhood public school, out of district public school, public traditional school and charter schools.  I even know some families that have different options for different kids (ex: one child in public school and one in private school). I know every family has made the decisions they have for specific reasons and many feel they are called to make the decisions they have regarding their child's education.  To me this isn't a right/wrong issue . . . it's a choice.

Here in Arizona we have a lot of freedom when it comes to school choice.  Basically, as long as there is room in a school, any student can apply for open enrollment at whatever public school they want.  Also, because of the way our charter school laws are written there are A LOT of choices for those.  It's almost mind boggling how many choices there are when it comes to the best school for your children.

Our oldest started Kindergarten in August so we've made our first venture into school this year (aside from the 2 years of preschool he had at a church preschool) so my husband and I are well versed in the choices available to us.   After weighing our options here's why we made the decisions we did:

a) We bought our house with the school in mind.  This is definitely NOT our dream house and there are things we'd change (including what we get for our money by living here), but we chose this neighborhood specifically for the schools.

b) We want our kids school friends to be their neighborhood friends.  We go to church about 25 miles from our home and so our kids' church friends don't live close enough to get together frequently.  We want to be able to have our kids' school friends over, and for our kids to hang out with their school friends in the neighborhood, without it requiring major driving on behalf of either set of parents.

c) We want our kids to get used to being "in the world".  We want our kids to be under our roof, where we can help them with their struggles, when they are exposed to ideas that may not necessarily be taught in our home.  We feel that they're going to have to eventually enter the "real world" and we want to be able to walk along side them, and guide them, as they realize what it means to follow Jesus in our culture.   

d) We want our kids to be salt and light to the world around them and we feel if they are only around people who believe the same way we do they won't be building relationships and be able to introduce their friends to Jesus.  I was an education major and had planned on teaching in a public school.  It's a very long story as to why I never taught, aside from my student teaching, but my reasons for wanting to teach in a public school are the same reasons I want my kids to attend one.   It's no secret that our schools can be a very dark place and that's why Jesus has told us to be a light to the world.  If all the light (Christian students and teachers) are removed from the public schools they will be even darker and we want to be part of the illumination that occurs.  

e) We are aware that there may be things taught, or said, that are in direct opposition to our belief system.  When this happens (because I know it will at some point) we are going to use it as a teachable moment for our kids about standing up for what is right.


These are just some of the reasons we've made the decision to send our son (and eventually our daughter) to the neighborhood school.  As with all things related to parenting, the situation is fluid and we're not ruling out another option down the road, but this is where we are right now.  If circumstances change and we feel it becomes necessary to re-evaluate our decision we will and we'll be confident that that is the best decision for our child at the time.

Somewhere out there . . .

I started following Christ when I was a freshman in college.  While in school I was introduced to the concept of praying for my husband, even though I didn't know who he was.  I thought the concept was good and I'd occasionally remember to do it, but it wasn't anything I did regularly.

A few years later I was at a conference and the speaker talked about how, when he was single, he picked a star in the sky to be his reminder to pray for his (future) wife.  This man wasn't talking about "Wishing upon a star", but he used the star as a reminder to pray to the One who created the stars for the woman he would eventually shar his life with.  Since I'd already proven to myself I wasn't very good at remembering to pray for someone I'd never met I latched on to this idea and decided to adopt it myself.  I picked the middle star in Orion's belt.

Though I didn't know it at the time, on November 8, 2002 God introduced me to the man I had been praying for.  Our first date was December 8, 2002 and we both knew fairly quickly this was "it".  In March, 2003 my (now) husband told me he knew he was going to marry me, but he wasn't ready to ask me, yet.  (Aside: 9.5 years and two kids later I still think that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard because were 26 and 36, he had a steady job, he owned his own home and I couldn't think of a single thing to wait for, but that's a story for another day. After we got engaged I told him how I felt back then and he still thinks it's hilarious; in fact, he tells me if he'd known how ridiculous I thought it was he would've waitied longer to propose. Goof.)

Memorial Day weekend, 2003 we loaded up my (now) husband's Nissan Xterra and headed for the mountains.  We didn't really have a plan, we just wanted to get out of the Phoenix heat and spend time together (I worked one full time job as a flight attendant and a part time job working retail so I had insane hours and we didn't have much free time together).  One of the ideas we'd talked about was just throwing a couple of sleeping bags in the truck and sleeping there.

Eventually we made our way to far Eastern Arizona and ended up camping there the entire weekend.  I had never been to that part of the state and immediately fell in love with it. (I was already in love with the guy I was with!)  One night during our trip we found our way to a meadow where we were just staring at the stars and talking.  Even though we couldn't see it in the summer sky, during that conversation I told him about Orion's belt and how I'd used that as my visual cue to pray for him.

This past week our little family of 4 rented a cabin about 20 minutes from that campsite that is so special to me.   As we were getting out of the car after dinner last night I looked up at the night sky for the first time all week.  Whether it was because of the time of year or time of night I couldn't quickly find Orion (it was COLD and wanted to get the kids in bed so I didn't look long), but I told our 6 year old and our 4 year old about how I prayed for Daddy years before we met.

Last night as I tucked my 4 year old into bed she and I prayed for her husband.  Orion and Eastern Arizona are significant in the story my husband and I share.  Now every time I see that constellation, or am in that part of the state, I am going to pray for two more I haven't met, yet: my future daughter-in-law and my future son-in-law.

Just a Mom

I've always been fairly confident in the decision my husband and I made, before getting married, that I would stay at home while our kids were little and I would not work outside the home until our kids were in school.

Now that my kids are getting older and my social circle is expanding from my friends to parents of my kids' friends I am often finding myself the only mom in the room who doesn't earn a paycheck and admit that when the question is asked of me,  "What do you do?" I shyly admit, "I'm just a mom".  I see the looks and hear the unspoken words from these moms who have "real" jobs and my confidence in our decision gets shaken.

In addition to the new experiences of my expanded social circle, for several years I have looked around at what others my age have accomplished professionally and I can't help by wonder, "What have I done with my life?"  I have a degree in a field I'm no longer interested in entering.  I worked up until just before the arrival of my oldest, but I've just had "jobs" and I've never had a career.  I have come to the realization that I will probably never have a career, even when I do re-enter the work force and get a job outside of the home.

In short, I have started to see my role as "just a mom" as one that is less than my peers who work outside the home and are wonderful parents.

Last week an amazing godly woman was called home to be with Jesus and I spent time this week thinking about her legacy.  I don't know if she worked outside the home while her children were young.  I don't much of her story, but I have spent time with her at family gatherings for as long as I've known my husband.  I didn't know "GG" well, but I know some of her kids, her grandkids and her great-grandkids and I know the legacy she and her husband built has impacted countless thousands of lives for all eternity.

GG has one daughter who has been as a missionary overseas her entire adult life serving children who desperately need Jesus' love and compassion.  GG's daughter has been Jesus' hands, feet, arms, and so much else to these children for several decades and the lives she has touched have been changed for all eternity.  I honestly don't ever remember having met this daughter (maybe a brief introduction once), but I know her family and I've heard of her and her work for years.

GG has another daughter who I know primarily as my friends' mom. My friends' mom is the board of directors for a missions organization and is the missions director at her church.  My friends' mom has raised a son and daughter who love Jesus, who serve Him in their community and who are raising their kids in the Truth.  I count both of her children as friends.

One of GG's grandsons and his wife are close friends of ours.  My husband and GG's grandson grew up in the same church together and have a friendship that has lasted decades.  GG's grandson taught at a Christian school and was a youth pastor for many years before he and his family went on the mission field.  Now Stateside this man is a pastor leading his own congregation. 

GG's granddaughter is also a friend and she is raising her family in the same church she grew up in.   While not in vocational ministry GG's granddaughter is serving her Jesus and is a light in her community to those who know her. GG's granddaughter and her husband have two young kids who they are raising in God's Truth.

GG has 4 great-grandchildren ranging in age from 19-2 and I can only imagine the future God has in store for them.

This amazing legacy of faith that has spanned several generations, multiple continents and to countless thousands of lives is all because one couple loved Jesus and demonstrated that love to their children.

While this legacy can (and IS) left by families where both parents work, single parent families where working is the only way to put food on the table and everything in between, it has caused me to re-think how I view myself and my role as Mom.

No matter if I one day have a job that out earns my husband's or if I never earn a paycheck again, I look at GG's life and remember that parenthood has an eternal impact for generations to come.

I am not "just a mom" . . . I am a woman who is one half of a couple raising our kids for eternity and praying we leave a legacy of Christ followers that lasts for generations to come.

What A Day!

Phew!

I'm glad it's almost 9 and all is quiet in my kids' rooms.  Today was a day.  Yes, I've had worse, but my venting today is too long for a facebook status so I came here :)

My husband had to go to CA for a meeting today, meaning he flew out at 7:30 this morning and was scheduled to fly back home at 8:05 tonight (which means he should be in the air right now).  Definitely a long and tiring day for him!  I am incredibly thankful for how hard he works to provide for our family as the only wage earner.

This morning, after the kids woke up, I had them grab several books and we all crawled into my bed where we read stories.  In my mind we were going to have a blissful morning spent cuddling and reading books.  The reality is the kids got ansty after 3 books and we moved onto the next activity.   My son's preschool class is planting flowers in the school flower bed and the students will be tending to the flowers for the remainder of the school year (about 6 weeks).  My son's teachers asked each student to bring in a flower this week to plant in the flower bed. Because of Good Friday my son doesn't have preschool Friday and tomorrow is the last day he'll attend this week so I knew we had to go buy his flower today.

We have been having problems with our dishwasher and the repairman was scheduled to come install a new motor today between 12-5.  I finally was able to get the kids fed, dressed, and out the door around 10 when my husband called saying he just received a phone call from the repairman asking if it was ok if he was early because he could be there in about 30 minutes.   I said, "Yes" and figured we could go buy my son's flower after rest.

After the kids had lunch and rested I tried getting them out the door, but again they were dragging their feet and we didn't actually leave for Home Depot until about 4pm.  The three of us fought the evening congestion around an industrial park to head to Home Depot--the closest store with a nursery.  Once at Home Depot my son picked out a marigold and we headed to our next few errands---Costco to get gas and then to the grocery store.  We got to the grocery store around 5pm and it was pretty crazy.  I managed to survive with some of my sanity in tact, considering at 5 and 3 my kids are too old to ride in the cart, but too young to not get distracted by all the interesting things in the grocery store.

The kids and I got home around 5:30 and I began to unload the groceries from the car while the kids ran inside.  Before I finished unloading the groceries I noticed my son had broken the flower off his marigold.  I had kept the potted plant in the front seat during our errands and I carried it inside once we got home telling him not to touch it, so I was a little frustrated knowing time was running out before he needed to deliver it to school.  I considered telling him, "I'm sorry.  You didn't listen to me and you broke it.  That's the plant you're going to take to school.  I'm sorry you won't have a pretty flower in the garden", but in the end I decided to load the kids back up and head back to the store.  Home Depot is only about 3 miles from the house, but the errand took us 45 minutes because of traffic.

I had been hoping to get the kids in bed early, but I didn't.  I did manage to feed them and get them in bed at their normal bed time (in part because we skipped baths tonight.  Shhh . . .don't tell anyone), but I was pretty emotionally drained from our hectic afternoon.  To top it off, when I picked up the mail I saw that I have been summonsed to serve jury duty with the City in May.   I guess I should be thankful I don't have to serve on my birthday, which is that same month :)

Holy Week traditions

According to the Christian calendar yesterday was Palm Sunday, the day Christians remember Jesus' triumphal entry into Jerusalem where he was greeted by crowds praising him with cries of "Hosanna".  By the end of the week Jesus would be dead and buried a tomb belonging to Joseph of Arimathea.

I often imagine that Saturday as one of the darkest days in human history as Satan thought he had won by killing Jesus, not realizing the ultimate victory would come on Sunday!

My kids are now 5 and 3 and I love watching their faith grow and hearing them speak the Truth.  Last night at the dinner table we were discussing Easter and even my 3 year old was able to tell me we celebrate Easter because Jesus died for our sins and rose from the dead.  This morning I was in our spare room/office when my daughter came in, out of the blue, and said "Mommy!  Jesus is the Truth!"

I want to take time this week and help my kids focus on the meaning of Easter.  For the past few days I have been trying to think of different ways to prepare their young hearts and minds for the commemoration of the most important day in all of human history.  I would also like to establish some traditions for our family as we mark this monumental week. 

One friend and her husband participated in a reverse Lent project that they completed over the weekend. I love this idea so much that I'm going to discuss with my husband the possibility of doing it in our home next year.

Last week a friend posted a picture of this Easter garden and I immediately went to the store to get the necessary items.  The kids and I made our own on Thursday and we'll remove the stone on Sunday morning.   My son was quite concerned we were waiting so long (over a week) to roll the stone away because, "Mom! Jesus rose from the dead on the third day! Why are we waiting so long?"

Each night we read to our kids out of their children's Bible as their bedtime story.  Generally my husband reads to our son, while I read to our daughter.   We made sure last night to read them the story of Jesus' entry into Jerusalem and will continue to read the events of this important week each night.

Though we will not be having a Seder dinner I am thinking about making a special dinner on Thursday night to remember the Last Supper.

Because we go to a large church they hold Easter services on Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights.   Our family will attend church on Saturday night, leaving Sunday for our family celebration.

Sunday morning we will hunt for Resurrection Eggs and discuss the story of Easter as we open the eggs.

As I look forward to the week I'm left wondering about what other traditions we can establish and activities we can do to remind us of the ultimate sacrifice made on the cross and the incredible victory of Jesus conquering death.

What are some activities your family does to mark Easter?

Spring Training!

I grew up in a baseball loving family.  I've gone to games regularly since I was 4 years old.  I remember taking road trips growing up to go watch the California Angels spring training in Palm Springs, CA.  I remember how much fun it was to meet the players and get their autographs.

I moved to the Phoenix area when I was in college and, at the time, we didn't have Major League Baseball here, but we had Fall Leage and Spring Training. Over the years I went to a few games with friends and had a great time.  Later on the Arizona Diamondbacks moved to town so my chances to go to games increased.

It was in the years after college that I really fell lin love with spring training.  First off, my Angels were now holding their spring training just down the freeway from my house.  Secondly, spring training games are very inexpensive.  Where the Angels train lawn seats were only $4 and parking in the nearby office park was free!  I loved the cheap baseball, the beautiful weather, and the comradarie of hanging out on the lawn! Even when I went to games by myself I always made friends with those around me.  In my first few years out of college I loved spring training so much that I would take my vacation time from work in March just so that I could hang out at the ballpark as much as possible.


The access to the players during spring training is amazing, too. It's very easy for kids to get autographs and to talk to the players.  Last week I decided the kids were old enough that they'd enjoy watching the free workouts and being able to meet the players.  Since my son started Little League last week I also wanted to show him that even the "real" baseball players have to practice before they can play in games.









The kids loved going to the workouts, though they didn't really understand why we were asking the players to sign their baseballs and they didn't know what an autograph was.  My 5 year old, while trying to ask the players, "May I please have your autograph?" was more likely to ask, "Would you like my autograph?".  That got a few chuckles :)  My son also loved telling the players that he was in Little League and is now playing t-ball, which started a few conversations where the players told him about how they played Little League when they were his age. 

All in all it was a great day and the circle is complete because I grew up going to games with my parents, and having them help me collect autographs, and now I get to do the same with my kids.   I can't wait to do this again next year, though I know my son will have to miss out because the work outs will be while he is in school.

Far From a Perfect Parent

Last night my 5 year old came into my room while I was sleeping (fairly common occurance--happens most nights around here) to let me know that he couldn't sleep because he was scared (again, fairly common).  Usually I pray with him and try to console him, but I was especially out of it at 1:30am so I just mumbled, "There's nothing to be scared of" and told him to go back to bed.  He told me he was still scared and I told him, "Just pray to Jesus and go back to bed".   THEN he told me that he was sweaty and I told him to take off his comforter and go back to bed.  (Are you noticing a theme in my responses?)

Without too much of a fuss he went back to his room and I rolled over to go back to sleep.

Somewhere around 3am I heard a noise that sounded like it was coming from my 3 year old's room so I got up to investigate (I'd apparently been imagining things because she was sleeping soundly).  I was coherent enough at that moment to realize that earlier I had blown off my son when he came looking to me for comfort.  I felt horrible and went in his room to check on him.  Fortunately he was sleeping soundly, so I just gave him a hug and said, "Love you, Buddy".

As I made my way back to my room last night after checking on my sleeping kids I started thinking about how my reaction to my son was exactly the opposite of God's reaction to me as His child.  When my son came to me scared I blew him off.  When I come to God with my fears he tells me, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, with thanksgiving, present your requests to Me and I will give you a peace that transcends all understanding"

I'm incredibly thankful that God is a much better parent than I am.  I am daily trying be more like Him and love my kids the way He loves me.

Holding On Tight

My oldest will be starting Kindergarten in August.  In just a few short months he will be in school more waking hours than he is at home, 5 days a week.  I have been blessed to stay-at-home with our kids and I believe the sacrifices we've made are worth it.  I'm not going to lie--there have been some HARD days where I wished I could send him to school and let somebody else deal with his endless questions and his temper.  There have been days I longed for a break and have dreamt of how "easy" life will be for me when he goes to school. 

As August, 2012 approaches I am becoming increasingly aware that the time I have with my son during the day is drawing to a close.  God has been teaching me a lot in the past 6 months about priorities and most of those lessons have centered around how much time I spend daily interacting with those I love the most.  This summer I resolved to make the most of this last year before my son goes to Kindergarten and focusing on spending as much time with him as possible. (I've even blogged about it before in September. You can find the links here and here) To add fuel to this desire to spend more time just "being" with my kids I have observed my son's Love Language is quality time.

My son attends preschool 9-11:30 MWF and I decided this summer that I was going to clear our schedules on Tuesdays and Thursdays for family time, instead of running around to play dates and other commitments.  My MOMs group meets Tuesday mornings, and because of how far we live from church, attending this meeting from 9-11am meant leaving home at 7:45am and getting home around noon. After 5 years of involvement I backed out of the MOMs group this year to spend more time with my kids. 

I don't get much "one-on-one" time with my oldest, since his little sister is always around :)  Yesterday my husband took a vacation day so he could have one more day off before returning to work after the holidays.  I knew my son needed a hair cut so when I woke up I told my husband that I was taking our son to get his hair cut and then I'd be taking him out to lunch.  I'd initially planned to take him to a breakfast place that's in the same building as a local hockey rink, but when we got there my son wanted to eat at a different restaurant, that ove looked the rink.  For over an hour I got to watch my son enjoy watching others skate (and ask me 5 million questions about them) and we decided we'd try our hand at ice skating another day.

After our special "date" yesterday morning the afternoon was capped off by a family trip to the park where our son attempted riding his bike without training wheels for the first time.  (Our neighborhood is very hilly and is NOT condusive to learning to ride, so we haven't had much time to do that before yesterday).  As I reflected on the great day we had yesterday I thanked God for the new perspective He is giving me.

The kids and I have gone on several "adventures" in the past few months and I'm looking forward to the ones we will go on between now and August.

God has given my husband and I our children, and they are only in our home for a short season. I have backed out of our culture of busyness in order to focus more on spending time with the family God has given me. There are things that need to be done (preparing meals, grocery shopping, laundry, dishes, etc.) but now I ask myself, before I make any decisions about my time, "Does my family need me more right now than _________?"    Sometimes the answer is that my family is best served by me taking a "break" and allowing the kids to spend some time with Dad.  Other times the answer is my family is best served when my husband and I get the chance to go out to lunch with each other and talk, while the kids stay with Grandma.  Most of the time, however, the most important thing I can do for my husband and kids is to just be there with them, enjoying the activities that make them smile.
I am increasingly aware of how fast time goes, and how fast these years vanish, so I am holding on tight to the time I have left. As others have reminded me, "These ARE the 'good old days'".