Me . . . Quiet?!?!

I confess . . . I can be kind of loud and I talk a lot. Not a huge surprise if you know me and definitely not something I'm proud of.   I'm constantly trying to work on these areas because I don't see them as positive personality traits.  Once I started following Christ and reading the Bible I was smacked between the eyes by the verses found in 1 Peter 3:3-5

 "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and clothes.  Instead, it should be that of our inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.  For this is the way the holy women of the past, who put their hope in God, used to make themselves beautiful."  

Though I have things to say about the first half of that passage, the part I really struggle with is how can someone, with my personality, fit into this definition of beauty since I really don't think there's much "gentle" or "quiet" about me . . .

Last night at church the pastor was teaching out of Judges and  made the statement "Faith is at it's best in community."  Because of a variety of situations going on in my life lately I have spent a lot of time pondering  those who have spoken truth into my life, even when I wasn't ready to hear it.  I've been thinking a lot about three women in particular.  One was a huge part of my life when I was in college and somebody I asked to mentor me.  We met every Monday night after she put her small kids to bed and talked about pretty much everything.  The second is a woman who I have known at a distance for years, but who I have only recently come to really know.  She is as wise as I've always perceived her to be.  The third is a woman I knew casually from my MOMS group and who has given her opinion to my facebook posts.  I readily admit that my first reaction to hearing her words was not to be appreciative, but it was to go on the defensive because I was a little offended.  The more I thought about what she said the more I thought about how right she was and the more I've sought her opinion out.

I appreciate people who are willing to tell me the truth, even when I'm not necessarily "ready" to hear it. A few weeks ago my facebook status read: "I'm thankful for my friends who love me the way I am, but who also love me enough to encourage me to grow". I know I'm far from perfect and I know I have a lot to learn in the struggle to be more Christ-like so I'm thankful for those who will give me the "kick in the pants" I need at times.



As I reflect on the things these women have in common with each other and with me I realize none of us are necessarily "quiet".  It's a good thing for me to have wise women in my life who I respect that aren't timid because I wouldn't have much in common with them if they were. 

All of these women are physically and inwardly beautiful.  While the world may not see them (or me) as "quiet" what makes them so beautiful is that they're regularly quiet before their God learning from Him and growing in His wisdom.  They are gentle in how they speak so that relationships are built and not destroyed.

I have a long way to go, but by spending time with God and following the example of these godly women I may one day have a gentle and quiet spirit, despite my personality . .

I'd pretty much forgotten . . .

Tuesday night I had the opportunity to cross an item off my "Lifetime To-Do List"  (Basically a "Bucket List", but mine was written about 10 years before I'd ever heard the term).  I grew up in a baseball loving family.  I've attended major league games since I was about 4 years old and it's something that was a regular part of my life growing up.  Those who've known me for any length of time know I'm a baseball fan.  I've attended games at 10 Major League Stadiums and consider one of my greatest summers the year (2000) when I attended 10 games in 7 different ball parks.

Tuesday night I got to attend the Major League Baseball All-Star Game at Chase Field in Phoenix.

This was a lifelong dream of mine and I was able to attend with my favorite person in the entire world . . . my husband!  My husband played Little League growing up, but he is not a baseball fan. He'll be the first person to tell you he's not a sports fan, but he bought the tickets as my birthday present and he attended with me. (LOVE that man!)

Because my husband isn't a baseball/sports fan I've never really "pushed" for us to spend our time/money going to games.  I don't watch baseball on TV in favor of something we both enjoy.   Until Tuesday night, the last game I'd attended was in June, 2006 when my childhood team, the Angels, were in town to play the Diamondbacks and my parents bought us all tickets.

Over the years baseball has dropped off my radar.  I still follow the Angels and Diamondbacks casually, but I'd be hard pressed to name the regular starting lineup for either team.  In recent years I'd begun to wonder  if I ever really enjoyed baseball myself or if I enjoyed it because I have good memories of attending games with my family growing up.  I had started to believe that baseball was something I followed growing up as a matter of survival in a baseball loving family, but it was something I didn't "need" at this point in my life.

My husband is gone for the evening and, as I was flipping channels, I saw the Diamondbacks were playing.   I turned it on and, as I watched the game and reflected on my experience Tuesday night I thought "Wow.  I really do enjoy this.  I'd pretty much forgotten that I really DO enjoy baseball."

I'll still pass over a D'backs game on TV in order to spend time watching Mythbusters with my husband, but it brought a smile to my face to know that baseball is still a part of me and while I may not "need" it I still enjoy it.  Now, please excuse me while I get back to the game before my husband gets home :)