Jesus chose HIM!?!?

This summer my church issued a "100 Day Challenge" where they challenged everyone to read one chapter of the Bible a day and journal using the SOAP method.  The SOAP method consists of journaling a key Scripture that God used to speak to you, writing an Observation about that passage, writing an Application of that Scripture and concluding with a Prayer about it.   I was very excited about this because, without knowing it, I developed a similar method over the years for myself when doing my quiet time.  Unfortunately, I fell behind early in the game and have yet to catch up.  Because God is who He is, He has used my laziness and spoke to me exactly at the right time, even though it's not on the "schedule" the church suggests.  

Last month I had a very rough night where some friendship issues I'd been dealing with for awhile got the best of me and I ended up in the bathroom crying over a stranger/sister in Christ.  The next morning I read Matthew 10 and was wondering, "What verse am I going to journal about because none are 'popping out' at me?"  (I am very task oriented and I WAS going to write about something doggoneit).   I decided I would write about the calling of the disciples where Matthew writes "These are the names of the twelve apostles: first, Simon (who is called Peter) and his brother Andrew; James son of Zebedee, and his brother John; Philip and Bartholomew; Thomas and Matthew the tax collector; James son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus; Simon the Zealot and Judas Iscariot, who betrayed him"

What sticks out of me is that description of Judas.  Matthew wrote, "Judas Iscariot, who betrayed him"  I thought about that for a minute and wondered, "Why would Jesus intentionally choose Judas as an apostle when He knew that Judas was going to betray Him?  That's weird.  Why would He invest himself in someone like that and allow that person to be in his inner circle? "  I was completely stumped and confused.  I guarantee if I were choosing people to invest my life in and teach I wouldn't pick someone I knew was going to hand me over to those who wanted me killed.

Coming off the hurt I'd recently been experiencing (and less than 12 hours after I was crying all over a stranger in the ladies room) I realized, "Jesus knows what it's like to be betrayed by a friend!"  I immediately remembered Hebrews 4:15, "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet was without sin."  Before I could fully process that, God continued to speak to me through this passage and I realized that Jesus knows that, as a mere human, I will betray him in my lifetime and He still loves me, has chosen me (Not the time to discuss Calvinism and predestination) and has invested in me.  Wow.  I'm really not that much different than Judas, am I?

The more I thought about this passage, and this new lesson God is teaching me, the more I realized I need to approach my relationships the same way Jesus did: Even though Jesus knew Judas was going to fail Him Jesus loved him anyway. Even though I may fail my friends, and they may fail me (we're all human, after all) we need to love each other anyway . . .